Wehhhh Life hard Wehhhh
How to tell the difference between different...
POWER METAL: The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
THRASH METAL: The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
HEAVY METAL: The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
FOLK METAL: The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.
VIKING METAL: The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL: The protagonist IS the dragon, dwells in the heart of the night with in a castle full of hellhounds and eternal flames. He kills the sassy knight, fucks the noble steed and sacrifices the princess to Satan.
GORE METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
DOOM METAL: The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
PROGRESSIVE METAL: The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
GLAM METAL: The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.
NU METAL: The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
Things women owe you:
the-inquisitive-grasshopper replied to your post: people, the girl I met on saturday, I’ve added her… SERIOUSLY, WHO IS IT YOU WILL NEVAR KNOW! Well, until I one day drag her to saunders
theforgottenworld replied to your post: people, the girl I met on saturday, I’ve added her… She might not have realised because she’ll have though she’d obviously accept as she added herself but Facebook doesn’t know that. Can you reply to the message? Please be nice and go for it :D I can, and have and like yeah stuff! I am going to try! but she is not making it easy!
people, the girl I met on saturday, I’ve added her on facebook, and by that i mean she nabbed my phone at campout and added herself. BUT she still hasn’t accepted my friend request so you know, there’s that. she did send me a message on there last night at like 3 in the morning as i was about to go to sleep so like, I dunno, stuff and things. she is really really cute!!!!
I met a really cute girl on saturday, she had to leave. I wanna talk to her.
Harry Potter songs
Madam Hooch: Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby let me know
Colin Creevey: I'm your biggest fan I'll follow you until you love me, papa-paparazzi
Voldemort: What doesn't kill you make you stronger
Seamus Finnigan: Tonight, we are young, so let's set the world on fire
Harry Potter: Who do you think you are, running 'round leaving scars?
Weasley twins: Baby you're a firework
I’d rather read the iTunes User Agreement.– one of the Amazon reviewers on Fifty Shades of Grey (via quicksummary)
lukehasmeowmix: pocketroxas: shooptastic: romanorgasm: raerfaun: “but you can’t be a lesbian, you look so girly!” “you must be a lesbian because you are so boyish” “if you’re a lesbian, then you’ll kiss that girl right over there to prove you’re a lesbian” “You can’t be a lesbian, you’re too pretty!” “But you can’t be gay, you don’t act girly enough!”
I would very much appreciate these
1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend?
2.When did your last hug take place?
3.Are you a jealous person?
4.Are you tired right now?
5.Do you chew on your straws?
6.Have you ever been called a tease?
7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
8.Do you cry easily?
9.What should you be doing right now?
10.Are you a heavy sleeper?
11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months?
12.Are you mad at someone right now?
13.Do you believe in love?
14.What makes you laugh no matter what?
15.Who was the last person you talked to?
16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like?
17.Will you get married?
18.When was the last time you smiled?
19.Does anyone like you?
20.Do you secretly like someone?
21.Who was the first person you talked to today?
22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
23.What are you NOT looking forward to?
24.What ARE you looking forward to?
25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it?
26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do?
27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year?
28.Are you a forgiving person?
29.How many TRUE friends do you have?
30.Do you fall for people easily?
31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend?
32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth?
33.Who was the last person you drove with?
34.How late did you stay up last night and why?
35.If you could move somewhere else, would you?
36.Who was the last person you took a picture of?
37.Can you live a day without TV?
38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?
39.Three names you go by..
40.Are you currently in a relationship?
41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie?
42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?
43.What’s your current problem?
44.Have you ever had your heart broken?
45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships?
46.How many kids do you want to have?
47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them?
Distractions would be dandy
I met a girl last night. She was really nice. we ended up talking for ages. we were hugging and stuff. then she had to leave. I dunno. It made me happy :)
mowgliiflows: Who said that I wasn’t right? I’ve lived for years without a life Don’t have a soul on my side Still ridiculed despite how hard that I have tried Don’t take me under your wing I don’t need a hand, don’t need anything I’ve got a roof over my head As if I’d rather be alone with me instead Close yet far Drop me a line and tell me how the hell you are And I’ll tip my hat to...
Woo woo, mustard makes me cry. I hate it. Suicide.– (via sruhhvalo)